As human beings, we find happiness and fulfillment in evolving and moving forward in our lives. In some cases, that progress is taking on a new role. In others, it is working toward a long-term goal or learning a new skill. Everyone’s definition of growth is unique.

Your growth edge exists one step outside of your comfort zone. Not ten steps - and certainly not 100 steps. One step.

When we’re declined for a role, we often hear that we aren’t supposed to take it personally. But it’s so natural to feel this way—you just put yourself out there for a role.

Here’s the thing: being declined may have nothing to do with you whatsoever. It’s easy to think that everything is about us, but there are so many factors that go into hiring decisions.

Here are just a few examples for you to consider:

When we want to achieve a goal or complete a project, we understand that it is vital to make the right decisions along the way.

However…Timing is equally important.

Think about applying sunscreen. If you’re about to head to the beach, putting on sunscreen is a good idea. If you’re about to go to bed, it’s a waste of time. 

I was lucky enough to have a great mentor early on in my career…

He’d talk to me about other parts of the business and how it all fit together. …

In one of our meetings he said, almost offhandedly, “Well, you could run that department one day.” To me, he might as well have said, “Well, you could fly to Mars one day.” It was completely outside what I understood was possible for me. 

We’ve all been there. You write someone an email. They write back. You make a mental note to follow up with them as soon as you get a minute - but then work gets a little crazy. 

You are called into a meeting. Your boss needs an urgent report. A coworker has an emergency and requires your assistance. A client calls and asks you to come to their office ASAP.

Eventually, the dust settles and you can finally return to your desk. You pull up your inbox, ready to respond to the email thread, only to find the other person has sent you a follow-up message: 

“?”

When pursuing a new goal, people tend to focus on what new habits or routines they’ll need to start.

This is the obvious way to start working toward a goal: I have a goal, and I’m coming up with the actions I need to take to achieve it. This is a really important, foundational part of a goal-oriented mindset! I’m all about it—seriously, I nerd out on this stuff.

However, something that people often overlook is what they need to stop doing.

I’m from Seattle and follow the Seahawks. As a result, I am also a big fan of Pete Carroll and his (sometimes unorthodox) approach to management. I am especially fond of his tendency to bring in a variety of guest speakers to talk to his team.

This season, Angela Duckworth, professor, scientist, and author of the book Grit, came to speak to the players during training camp. One of the things she talked about was goal fusion, the idea that a goal is integrated into one's self-concept.

When they practice goal fusion, high-performance athletes do not focus on the hard or mundane activities they do every day.

When they train, they don’t say, “I’m doing drills!” They say, “I’m winning the Super Bowl!”

In other words, they fuse the boring stuff together to help them focus on a high-level goal.